Supporting A Grieving Person

Because of the gathering restrictions in place due to the COVID-19 pandemic we understand that supporting someone who is mourning the death of a loved one is especially difficult at this time.

One of the wonderful things that happens at funerals and receptions is the chance for people who are grieving to be seen in their grief and be supported by those that love them. We encourage you to reach out and share your stories of the person who has died with their loved ones. It is a wonderful way to honor the life they lived and acknowledge how hard it must be for the family to be without them.

In the face of grief, it is hard to know the right thing to say or do but it is ok to admit that. The worst thing you can do is not say or do anything at all. 

Reach out!

  • Send an email or card.  (If you don’t have the address we will forward it for you.)
  • Make a concrete offer to help
    • Offer to drop easily frozen meals off at a specific day/time
    • Offer to go to the grocery store and leave groceries on the steps
    • Offer to make a trip to the Laundromat or Post Office
    • Offer to help with garden and yard work
    • Offer to organize an online memorial page or another way to collect stories, memories, and photographs that can be shared
  • Leave a book, magazine, puzzle, or Netflix idea in the mailbox
  • Send flowers or a plant. If you know a favorite color or object ask the florist to incorporate it. Try and support your local florist when you do. We have a great list of local florists on our website.

Get creative with your friends and neighbors 

  • Organize a drive-by parade at a time when you know the family will be home
  • Put candles in the windows of nearby houses along with the name and/or things that symbolize the person who has died
  • Have a socially distanced picinic in the neighborhood where people can gather on their own lawns but share food, drink, and memories. Perhaps all while wearing a favorite color/sports team of the person who has died
  • Create a shared calendar to make sure that the people who are grieving are getting the support they need over the days, weeks, and months when a kind phone call or offer to run an errand can really make a difference
  • Collect stories, memories, and photos of the person who has died and make a physical or virtual memory book to share 

Recognize that you may be grieving too

When someone dies, it isn't just their family and loved ones who grieve- their loss ripples throughout their community. Reaching out to support the family is one way to address the loss you are feeling.



Guare & Sons, Barber & Lanier Funeral Home
Phone: (802) 223-2751
30 School Street, Montpelier, VT

© Guare & Sons, Barber & Lanier Funeral Home
Crafted with care by Frazer Consultants and TA